Day 9

This post almost didn't happen. Today was a "no good, horrible, extra cranky, I-want-to-move-to-Australia," kind of morning. And that pretty much sums up my feelings about my manuscript (book? screenplay? I just want to write my story).

I am no stranger to feeling like giving up, so I went to my Nanowrimo inbox and the top item was a pep talk. Perfect. Then this quote made me laugh and a glimmer of hope has been restored.

"...move faster into the future. The world is full of people who say it can’t be done. If everyone listened to them, we’d still live in caves—and there would be no such thing as books."

- Dean Koontz

There is no one actively criticizing my book-writing efforts except myself. My inner critic is far rougher on me than any real critic will probably ever be. It says, "You can't do this. It's no good. You're no good. You'll never finish. Even if you do finish you'll never get published. You can't write. Ha ha ha ha ha."

How do I respond to my inner critic? This is me pushing the delete button. Delete. Delete. Delete. Deep breath.

"Wherever you are, keep moving forward." This was the title of the second message in my Nanowrimo inbox. And also a theme in my devotions lately. And something Tea has to deal with.

When I started prepping for Nanowrimo this year, I promised God that I would show up every day. That's it. I did it. Today I showed up. And I have each of these 9 days (except not Sunday), despite only having a few hundred new words. Just looking at my word count yesterday almost made me want to give up.

But I am still here. And I'll be back tomorrow too. So there.